From 21c6e529591d5f2ca7b1e9e7239b9e2ef549ff9a Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001
From: Daniel Newman <me@dtnewman.com>
Date: Sun, 17 May 2026 09:01:11 -0400
Subject: [PATCH] make script groovier

---
 bin/burn | 21 +++++++++++++++++++++
 1 file changed, 21 insertions(+)

diff --git a/bin/burn b/bin/burn
index 547c2bc..f391ca3 100755
--- a/bin/burn
+++ b/bin/burn
@@ -144,6 +144,27 @@ if ((tokens < MIN_TOKENS)); then
   exit 2
 fi
 
+# Hard stop at 1,000,000 tokens. Past this point we feel obligated to
+# remind the user — out loud — what they actually downloaded.
+JOKE_THRESHOLD=1000000
+if ((tokens > JOKE_THRESHOLD)); then
+  cat >&2 <<'EOF'
+
+🔥🔥🔥  HOLD ON A SECOND  🔥🔥🔥
+
+You just asked to burn more than 1,000,000 tokens.
+
+Friendly reminder: THIS REPO IS A JOKE. It is a satirical bash script
+that lights real money on fire to inflate vanity metrics. There is no
+business reason to run it. The README is sarcasm. The "enterprise
+version" is not real. Your CEO might not be impressed.
+
+Refusing to proceed. Go touch grass. 🌱
+
+EOF
+  exit 1
+fi
+
 # ~4 chars/token is the standard rule of thumb for English text.
 target_chars=$((FILLER_TOKENS * 4))
 filler_len=${#FILLER_LINE}